May

25

Beach Breast Holders

funny bikini photo

This lady found herself a clever way of laying down in the sand without squishing her boobs. I guess for some that hurts them. Anyways her idea was genius as you can see in the above picture. I think all beds and any other device you can lay down on should come equipped with something similar. That would totally boobular!

Apr

20

Sticky Star Bikini

bikini stars

This not-so-clever bikini is made from the same type of sticky stars that your kindergarten teacher likely put on your school papers to denote a certain amount of “job well done”. I just really hope this girl didn’t stay out in the sun very long like that. The resulting sunburn would look utterly gruesome.

Apr

19

The 30 million dollar bikini

It would probably be pretty safe to say you can’t afford this bikini. It’s made from flawless white diamonds set in platinum, and it’ll set ya back a cool 30 mil. The only celebrity crazy (and rich) enough to make such a purchase is none other than Tiger Woods. He recently bought this bikini after his divorce was final. Wonder who the lucky gal is? Or maybe he just bought it to wear around the house on Saturdays. Because, you know, he is Tiger Woods and all.

Apr

16

The goldfish bikini

Here’s another one we’ll file under “what the hell were they thinking”? This goldfish bikini is truly bizarre. I sure hope it was created and meant to be a gag, instead of something you’d actually want to wear. Putting goldfish in containers they’re not supposed to be in is nothing new, but this is probably the first time you’ve seen it done with a bikini!

Apr

14

Lindsay Lohan’s stylish ankle bracelet

Celebutard and repeated parole violator Lindsay Lohan is shown here wearing a stylish new ankle bracelet along with her bikini. I swear whenever I see someone wearing one of these, it always reminds me of those electronic fences they have for dogs. I suppose Lindsay’s ankle bracelet performs much the same function. That doesn’t change the fact that she looks great in a bikini though!

Apr

12

Patricia Heaton loses her belly button

Here we see the lovely Patricia Heaton of Everybody Loves Raymond fame carousing on the beach. Only, there’s something out of place – ahh that’s it – she’s missing a belly button! How in the world does that happen? Immaculate conception? Afraid not. Apparently she had a tummy tuck and in the process lost her belly button. I dunno about you, but I think it’s a little creepy looking. I also think Patricia was cute as a button before she mangled her body like this. Celebrities!

Apr

11

The ham-bikini

We seem to have somewhat of a fascination with meat and bikinis. Lady Gaga’s meat bikini comes to mind. You’ve seen the meat bikini, now meat (get it, meat? ha!) the ham-bikini! I wasn’t able to find much information on this fashion nightmare, but all I can say is you’d have to be a pretty confident type to wear a bikini like this. I have to wonder what those pork heads are made of!

Jan

27

Bikini Bottom Mishap

evangeline lilly picture

Here’s the lovely Evangeline Lilly trying to surf in Hawaii. Turns out the surf got the best of her and tried to take her bottoms right off. This is one bikini mistake I’m super happy to have seen as I’m sure most of you here will agree with.

Jan

10

Wardrobe Malfunction

Poor Whitney Port. Her bikini just won’t stay on. The multi-colored leopard print string tie bikini looks like it has a mind of its own. The cups are migrating west while the bottoms are migrating south. Perhaps she just got tumbled in a big wave (hey, it’s possible) or maybe it’s an old suit and the elastic has worn away. Or maybe she should get just a bikini that fits.

Jan

06

Sunburn

Her day probably started out normal enough. A friend called to invite her to the beach, she dug out a bikini, put some drinks in a cooler and headed out. And then she must have not moved for the next six hours because not only does she look as red as a lobster but those tan lines are crisp.

One word: sunscreen.

Have fun peeling dead skin off your butt.